I want to do a trillion things in this life. Become a good Grappler/Wrestler Compete in Fighting Compete in Kung Fu Competitions. Become a Master of Kung Fu Learn the Naginata Travel to Thailand, Japan, Kunming Study in College in Germany Open my own Martial Arts Gym Learn about Photography/Video Editing Hike one of the big trails in America I'd like to be fluent in other Languages Chinese, German, Thai or others I'd like to learn an instrument or throat singing. I'd like to do the splits Ranting Okay, so maybe not a trillion but these are all the things I'd like to do. With enough faith I believe I can achieve all of these goals but it will take time, discipline, and dedication. Focusing on one goal each month or each year is what I need to do. Of course I can work on many of these things at once but I cannot work on all of them. So as I've been reflecting in my Monk Manual, I've learned about myself quite a lot. I waste a lot of time on things not related to goals I have no structure to help build habits to achieve my goals These two problems are intertwined together as I believe if I had a structure, I wouldn't waste time. I need classes, teachers, and classmates to challenge me or teach me. To keep me accountable just so that I feel I have to do it. That way I only have one thing to worry about which is the self discipline of showing up to these classes. Anyway, I'm just kinda lost as to what I'm doing now. I've got some tournaments and Summer Camps to go to but I'm not sure what's the point of going to them now. -Johnny Fuger

All of my pay stubs say that this year I've been working 100+ hrs each pay period (2 weeks). Last year, I was hitting 60-90 hours each pay period. Somehow, this year I'm working more while doing more. I've started to go to class regularly again. Sparring, rolling, training. I'm back into a kettlebell routine as well. My chaotic life is slowly finding a balance... with some sacrifices. I'm not able to "play". I rarely have time to paint anymore or do game sessions with my dad or friends. Usually a deviation from the schedule I've got wrecks my mind and body. But, I'm getting better at going right back to my routine. So I'm doing all of this for a reason right? Normally, I'd go on a rant about my plan and what it is. I'd beat the dead horse some more, saying what I'll do in order to achieve this goal. Stepping back from the foul smelling corpse that is my plan, I don't think there is a plan anymore. It's just been me beating the ground, making myself exhausted. Of course, I still have things I want to do. (Lots of things) Those hundreds of hours into my job, the many months that have past by in a blur due to work, injury, sadness, and exhaustion; all make me wonder if the way I'm achieving my goal is worth it? Let's remind ourselves of what my goal is: To become a Warrior Monk To be a fighter (Compete in Thailand and the USA) To go to college abroad (to see a new culture, learn a new language) Open my own gym/dojo/temple (Once I'm ready to settle down) Those are my goals simplified. There are many other small things I want to do in life but the ones listed above are the "BIG ONES". The difficulties I'm facing on the road to these goals are mostly in my head, so I don't really talk about them much. There are other boring challenges like work and health that I don't think people would be bothered to read so I don't write those either. Just wanted to pop in and say that the jounrey is still going. I've just hit some bumps in the road that need to be gone over. -Johnny

Over the weekend at work, I had three people ask me if I was okay. I was just tired. My eyes burned, muscles were sore, and my mind was trying to go through the exercises that were in the books I've been reading recently. The small changes I've been making everyday are adding up. So, I'm happy to finally have gotten some rest. Last week was the first four day weekend I've taken since starting the job as a team lead for the weekend crew. This week, I'll get a three day weekend due to the boiler being out at our factory. The money that I'm getting from the overtime is great but it really is taking away from my other hobbies, like martial arts and this website. With January and February being full of overtime and work, it seems that March and April are going to be focused on martial arts. I wish to start training two hours a day again in prep for the tournaments in the summer. Even though I'm not training Kung Fu, it still is Kung Fu. Getting better at Kickboxing and BJJ will give me a better appreciation for Kung Fu later on in my journey. Because, let us be honest, it all is connected. It was while reading Complete Enlightenment that I thought about how it is all connected. To be this "warrior monk", I don't have to live in a temple and train Kung Fu. I want to. But don't have to. I can study, train, and learn by myself with what I have just like I did in Wisconsin. By doing this, I will arrive at the temple/school a better prepared student. Who knows? Maybe I'll get a unique understanding of what I practice by pursing it in this way. Other than that, I'm just tired and hopeful. -Johnny

"You're a hard worker, I saw that day one." -Mark As my laundry dries, I thought I'd write a post detailing what the next few months should look like. My job is running short on people so they're allowing me to put in some overtime if I want to. Since I found out that in the summer there will be two tournaments and two kung fu summer camps, I'll need the extra money. What this means is that February to May I'll be busy with work. This doesn't mean I'm stopping my other tasks, I'm still studying German and Chinese, still practicing BJJ twice a week and (now) I'm practicing a little bit of Kung Fu. Not too much to hurt myself, usually just 30-40 minutes. The tournaments and camps I plan on going to are: Kuo Shu Tournament in Maryland ICMAC Tournament in Orlando Shaolin Training Camp in Germany Shaolin Warrior Camp in New York Tangled Mind All of this activity certainly doesn't help my tangled mind. I'm learning to enjoy my days no matter what conditions are thrown at me. Taking a few minutes here and there to relax helps me realize how enjoyable simple things like work and drinking water are. With all of the changes I've made to my routine, breathing has to be the easiest but most helpful change. I think about before where I was sick, injured and burnt out from work. There were many things wrong. Diet and rest were the two biggest ones. Now, I nourish my body to keep it strong and well. I rest when needed, even during work. Five to ten minutes of just breathing, done throughout the day, really helps flush your mind of "junk". A prayer said before meals to boost the spirit. All of it, helps. All of these habits also rely on a mindfulness of yourself. I'm not quite sure how I've developed my small awareness of myself, but there are many books out there to help you. One thing is for sure, it takes effort. Everything does. So that is what I'm doing to help my mind be less tangled up in thoughts, but why am I still struggling? Because of the uncertainty of where my next journey is... ...I have ideas of where I want to go, I'm saving money, building up my skills, and more. But I have no clue of where I'm going to go. As last Summer showed, plans are never concrete. Just have to relax and make the most of every day. -Johnny Fuger, the tired worker.

Happy Chinese New Year, Happy Birthday Mom, and Happy Birthday Me. Birthday - Once a Rabbit, Now an Earth Tiger I remember going out to eat with my family when we were little to a place called "Hong Kong Buffet". There were scrolls and various other Chinese decorations all about. The cheap booths and tables were all around the central buffet area. Of course, we always got a booth. We'd all grab our plates and begin choosing what food we wanted, rice, crab rane goon, general tsao's chicken, kung pao chicken, lo mein and more. After returning to the table, we'd place our plates on the cheap paper place mats. After praying, we'd eat and talk. One topic that was always talked about here was "What zodiac are you?". Then we'd all look at those cheap paper place mats which were decorated with the Chinese Zodiac. I'd look up my year, and every time, I'd be a rabbit. 1999. Fast forward some, to 2019/2020, when I discover that I'm not a rabbit at all. The zodiac says that, I'm a tiger. An earth tiger at that. Very different personalities, a tiger and a rabbit, but they do have their similarities. Even though I don't take the zodiac too seriously, it is interesting to see the correlations between reality and prediction. I think both depictions of myself are accurate. A timid, gentle, shy rabbit sometimes, while other times a proud, adventurous tiger. But now, New Year has passed and the Lunar New Year begins. It is supposed to be "my" year. With struggles in my career, health, and love. Last year had all of these challenges as well. Let's see if I can conquer this year! Future Adventures As always, I'm thinking of what I want to do and how to get there. Even more so as I hear from old friends and coworkers about the situations that they are in. Depression, debt, loneliness, relationship issues, drug issues, and more. To not use this motivation I have, the drive that I've been blessed with, certainly would be a waste. So what is the next adventure looking like? If the situation allows I would like to: Go to Thailand for a Year, Train at Tiger Muay Thai and find a language school. I'd like to visit temples and experience the culture there. After that, the plan relies on the governments of other countries. Kunming Shaolin Temple is where I'd like to go after Thailand. This would be the big 3-4 year trip in order to earn my Certificates for Wushu. OR, I will try to go to Shaolin Temple Europe for two years. I would have to fill out an application and do an interview, with the hope of getting accepted. The best scenario? I'd go to both! These three locations are the building blocks of my plan. I want to go there so I can learn and experience what I want to. In my mind, I've finally separated all the other places into smaller adventures. Henan Shaolin Temple Qufu Kung Fu School Yun Tai Kung Fu School Chiang Mai Tiger Muay Thai Another Visit to Maling Kung Fu School Wudang Mountains Japan These are all places that I was considering to be the bigger adventure spots. After many months of thinking, comparing, and reflecting. I figured out what places would give me what I wanted. Narrowing it down to these few locations also helps me plan better. After the many years of Kung Fu training, I plan on going to College in Germany. For what? I'm not certain yet, maybe Sports Science Major with a minor in Computer Science. Some Thanks I have to wish my Mom a happy birthday again, I hope she had a good one. I also want to say thank you to my parents. Thank you for letting me live in this home while I work towards this goal of mine. Thanks for all the guidance you've given me, and thanks for the home, food, and love. I would like to thank my sister too, without her help early on I would have never made it to Maling. Thank you for letting me live with you and your growing family. I know you're going to do well, and you're a wonderful mom to your kids. January is over. My Birthday has passed, I'm now 23 years young. Keep training. Keep studying. Keep on working towards your dream. The Hopeful Wanderer, -Johnny Fuger

1/21/2022 3:53 am My room is clean but my desk is unorganized. Unpainted miniatures lay scattered between the various pens and pencils that cover my desk. Sitting behind my laptop between two bookends are a collection of various martial art and religion books. A top the pile of wisdom sits my camera. Little Buddhas and monks are scattered around the table, hiding themselves behind lamps, bottles, and cups. A tired me, sits upon a camping stool, typing away. It has been eleven days since I've started studying German vocabulary in tandem with my Chinese HSK studies. Both languages keep me intrigued and happy, I just hope I'm able to use them in the future. Training is also slowly creeping back into my daily routine. BJJ three times a week with the occasional stretching session or kettle bell session. It is not the intensity that I'm used to (or like) but it still scratches that itch. Why Two Languages? The reason for adding German is to help me prepare for traveling there. Either for university (in the far future) or for Shaolin Temple Europe. As I've mentioned before, I hope to start HSK 4 within this year. Studying two languages also gives me a better mental challenge that my work or training doesn't give me. Even though I started to study Thai towards the end of 2021, I realized it isn't that important to me... yet. I still plan to go to Thailand for Muay Thai training and I thought, why not find a language school there that works with my training schedule? I could study German and Thai while in Thailand for the potential year. Other Progress Besides becoming more focused on my studies, I've made some progress financially as well. I've saved a good chunk of money within my first 12 months of being in Minnesota. If I keep saving like I have been, I will definitely have enough cash to explore the world the way I want. I've also been trying to pray, meditate, and be more mindful throughout the day. With the help of the books that I got on Christmas, this has helped the struggle of being at work for so many days. Work is never ending, and you can always find other work. The last bit of progress has been on my website. I paid for a few years of premium, so my site looks a bit more professional now. I've also added the new "Travels" section. This gives more insight into my travels and is a place to put a lot of my photos. I know most of the photos are not professional or edited, but to me, they hold memories for me. I hope they inspire you to go on your own adventures as well! Besides that, my work weekend starts anew. I hope you all enjoy your weekend. The studying traveler, Johnny

01/07/2022 Rolling Dice. Pencil Lead. Printed Paper. Laughter and Plastic Figures. What I do for fun. If I had a resolution for this year, I guess it would be this: "Become a better student. A student of martial arts. A student of study. A student of myself." I say this because the past two months haven't been well on my body or mind. Yes, I have been able to work more towards my monetary goal and I have been reading more books. These are great things but, I still need to maintain my other interests. For martial arts, I'd like to focus only on BJJ this year. Once Summer rolls around I will begin Kung Fu again so that I can go to tournaments but even then, BJJ will be more important than Kung Fu. To be honest with myself, one of the reasons I neglect BJJ and sparring is because I'm not good at it. Hopefully, this year will change that. So I've narrowed down my focus for martial arts, what about my study goals? Last time, I was talking about learning Thai, German and Chinese. I've decided that Mandarin (Chinese) will be number one. I'd like to study through HSK 3 and start HSK 4 before the year is up. This means working on my listening, speaking, and writing. It also means reviewing some things from HSK 1 and 2 as well. Thai is my #2 language to learn only because I've paid for two years of ThaiPod101. Then German, as I'd like to go to college in Germany. Finally, myself. I did really good on the last three months of 2021 fixing bad thoughts and bad habits. It took a lot of effort though. No longer is my room the disorganized mess it once was. I make my bed each day before going to work and I make sure I have food while I'm at work to nourish myself. My sleep has gotten way better too, taking naps isn't the enemy. Exhaustion is. These conclusions have been brought about by my own reflection and in part by the books I've been reading. Even as I write this, I know that maintaining this kind of constant development will be hard. There will be ups and downs but if I can keep focused on these separate goals, I believe I can accomplish a lot. From the Hopeful Worker, Johnny PS: My dad and I played Zweihander yesterday and the day before. It was a lot of fun!

01/02/2022 6:17 am A beating heart. Warm Legs. Cold Toes. My life goes on. Despite the negative twenty degree temperature, my night was pretty good. My training as lead began and already I had to make some decisions. I'm just glad nothing went wrong today and I hope today goes just as well. In my mind, I'm trying to calm down my thoughts. Each day they get a little better and better, but not like at Maling. I really would silence all thoughts, and when I'd let them come back. It would feel like a tidal wave coming down a hallway. Now, I usually quiet my thoughts for a few minutes at a time before they start creeping back in. A little bit of progress is better than no progress. 2022. What will you throw at me? The tired worker, Johnny

1/1/2022 Silently spinning. Always there. The fan watches from above. 3:37 am Late Night Thoughts I spent this New Year in Minnesota with my mom, dad, and grandma. My dad and I played video games in the morning after I got home from work, then I went to sleep. Upon waking up, we all gathered to partake in the Hot Ones Challenge where you eat different chicken wings of varying degrees of spice. I made it all the way. It did make me throw up about an hour after the challenge as that 2,000,000 Scoville hot sauce really eats at your gut. Once midnight arrived my dad shot off his firework board in the frigid air as my mom and grandma stood watching from the deck above. We watched the fireworks sparkle in the dark winter night then went inside for warmth. Grandma immediately went to bed. My mom followed after watching a TV show. My now tipsy dad and I played Undaunted with me as the victor. Which led to him going to sleep. Now it is just me, alone in the night with a stomach still burning from the hot sauce and milk tea concoction. My training as a lead begins this evening which will be the first of many challenges in this new year. In reality, today is just like any other day but it is the actions that make today special. This insight was given to me by this video in combination with my work schedule. Maybe thinking this way will help me make everyday meaningful. I finished reading Work by Thich Nhat Hanh which has helped me become more mindful of my actions at work and coming home. Slowly, my goals like studying and mediation are becoming daily habits even if I just do them for 10-30 minutes. These habits will hopefully change me into the person that I want to become. A person who pushes themselves to their potential. A person of good health, wisdom, intelligence, and good heart. Zodiac Fun This New Year is the Year of the Tiger. I am an Earth Tiger so it is supposed to be a really good year for me. Last year was also supposed to be a really good year for me, which it was besides the health issues in May and November. Even though my belief in the Zodiacs isn't the best, it is fun to look at every once in a while and see what is/isn't accurate about the predictions. To my surprise, the career and health predictions for 2021 were suspiciously accurate. I've always had an interest in these fortune type things though, especially Zoltar. Believe it or not, its still innocent fun. So ,what now? Holidays are over, work begins. My training in BJJ starts again. I'll continue to save money, study hard, train, and become a better person. I hope you all do well in the New Year too. The working wanderer, Johnny

As night has become my day, I've noticed that I feel different. If I'm at work or if I'm awake in the day I feel motivated, happy, and detached from my thoughts. When night sets in and all go to bed, my thoughts become "heavy" or negative. I'm getting better at "fighting" these thoughts but some days they just win. At least Christmas has kept me busy through the nights. Finding gifts for others, getting rid of old clothes, cleaning my room, and preparing for my promotion. Future Travel Gear Throughout this week I've been looking at travel gear for my future adventures. Since I plan on traveling, making videos, writing blog posts, and training I've realized I need a lot... and not a lot. If that makes sense. To keep travel easy, I want to take two bags: my Fuji Hybrid Fighter Bag (which they don't make anymore) and my future travel bag... the Prvke 41L. I plan on keeping my Fighter Bag empty until I reach Thailand. Tiger Muay Thai offers a gear package so I'll just get that to fill the Fighter Bag. The fighter bag will also carry my future monk robes! As for the Prvke bag, I also plan on buying the smallest camera cube they have. For everyday carry I'm thinking of getting the D1 Fanny Pack. This idea actually comes from the Pakt Travel Bag, which includes a nifty little waist belt/fanny pack thing. I think this small fanny pack will come in handy for carrying my money, passport, and phone while being able to hide it in a jacket or something. Other items on the list are: Some Kind of Haircut Kit to keep my head bald, Manscaped? Some Wireless Earphones, I'm thinking the Fitness Raycons Hiking Pants that zip into shorts Journal Maybe a new laptop (If the budget allows for it) Options I still have a year of hard work and saving money. It is good to have a few options for my travel plan, in case restrictions or certain situations make it so that I can't go to China. In any situation, I'd like to go to Thailand first. If I can't go to China then I'll try to stay in Thailand for a year. Studying the language and martial arts. Then, I'd head to Europe's Shaolin Temple for another year. Studying German and Chinese Martial Arts. Hopefully, I'll just be able to go to China to study. Language, Martial Arts, Culture, and Religion. Those are the things I like studying. Hope you had a good weekend. ~The always planning traveler.

For some reason my mind is preparing me to leave now... even though I still have twelve whole months of saving money left. I'm looking at travel backpacks, travel tripods, and thinking about what I want to learn at Shaolin. (Everything, obviously) I guess this is due to the fact that on the 19th my promotion becomes official. Which means I get paid more. If I continue to work overtime, continue to save money, and continue investing. I would be able to surpass my original intentions. I could travel more, see more places, learn more, do more. I'm happy just thinking about it. Thinking. As the first big snowfall of this winter arrives, I keep wondering if I've done good this year. Some of the goals that I set were met this year, like saving money, study personal training, and going to a tournament. Many others were not accomplished this year: getting into the splits, going to a fight, training every day, make my online courses, get bigger, get stronger and probably a few more. These "results" of all my actions show that in my "spirit", working hard to save money is the ultimate objective. Actions are truth, and everything I've done shows what is truly important to me. If I was a true martial artist, nothing would stop me from training. I'd train at work on breaks, after getting off work, on the weekends, or when I wake up. I don't know when my drive to train died but I certainly don't feel right without it. Time is going by so fast, I feel like I waste a lot of it. Johnny

"I think now, looking back, we did not fight the enemy; we fought ourselves. And the enemy... was in us." -Chris Taylor, Platoon As the weekends normally do, it left me with a lot of reflection. Perhaps too much. Independence I spent my Thursday night/ Friday morning working hard at the factory, working without rest. The staff shortages are making work hard for everyone as people just don't show up. On top of the inconsistent work force, many of the guys are switching shifts. Weekend guys are working weeks, many guys are working extra hours. All while the orders keep coming in giving us endless pressure. Most of the workers are getting lax due to the holidays or due to being over worked. So why is this important? Well, it occurred to me during my reflections that as long as there is work; progress will be made towards my goal. It seems that I will reach my goal after another year of hard work. If I put in a little extra work next year I will exceed my goal. This constant work is something that I require. It fuels me and keeps me away from my bad habits. Work is apart of my "Support Network". My family and friends are another part of that network. They keep me busy, focusing on things that are not myself. While in China the teachers at Maling filled this position and Kung Fu was my "work". In a way I'm not really that independent of a person. I rely on others for support, a lot of it, in order to keep me on track. If left to my own, I'm not sure how well I'd do. Studies Continue... Besides my reflections on independence, I am still studying Thai, Chinese, and Photography. I've started on HSK 3 as a review before I move on to HSK 4. My plan is to finish HSK3 and 4 by 2023. As for Thai? I'm just studying so that I can get the basics down, say some phrases. If I'm able to go to Thailand like I've planned I will find a Thai language school near Tiger Muay Thai so that I can attend classes and train at the same time. Photography is simply focusing on learning all the new gear that I have. To do that, I need to take more pictures. That's enough from me for today. Ramblings from the stationary traveller, Johnny "When I sit alone Come get a little known But I need more than myself this time ... The more I see, the less I know The more I like to let it go"