“One very therapeutic thing I like to do is drive my car around and see normal people… I see an old lady with their groceries store bag, and I’m thinking, she doesn’t care if I win the fight Saturday or not. Then I look, there’s a guy yelling to another guy because of whatever problem. This other guy is going to the bank to pay his mortgage. They don’t care…”
My Girlfriend went home today.
That leaves me to return to training. Honestly, the time spent with my girlfriend made me realize a few things:
1) You can do a lot in a day, you just have to plan and push yourself.
2) I still don't understand time.
The morning was spent sleeping, packing, eating, and sitting in a taxi. After dropping her off at the airport and waiting for her to get on the plane (due to China flights still suddenly cancelling), I tried to find my way back to Tiger Muay Thai. What I was surprised to find out was: you cannot use any ride sharing apps to get picked up from the airport but you can use it to drop yourself off. Instead, you either have to take a 5-10 minute walk outside the airport and arrange a ride or you just use the taxi hasslers at the airport.
So I did, after paying 800 Baht I was told to go past the smoking area. Before reaching the smoking area I was talked to by a bunch of guys smoking. They started looking at my beaded necklace and bracelet, not before I saw one guy sitting try to nab the 100 Baht bill I had in my hand. They asked me if I did Muay Thai, to which I replied Yes, and kept walking. Going past the smoking area, I saw that there was no one there. Then it dawned on me as I turned around. The group of smoking individuals were the people I was supposed to meet. One of them was waving me back, and began talking on their walki-talki. Eventually I was put in a taxi and driven back. Luckily, the driver was more pleasant than the rest.
Back to Training, Asking Why?
After coming back to my hot, empty accommodation. I decided to get right back to training. It was already 4:00 pm, meaning I couldn't get to class. Instead, I decided to use the weight room and run a little bit.
One thought that came from this video was, Why am I training? I've thought about this question before and the answer hasn't changed in a long time. Right now, I simply train and fight because it is something that I enjoy. Is that enough of a motivation? People talk about using troubles, issues, or things like getting bullied when a kid as their why to fight. For me, I believe I dealt with any of that at Maling.
Training gives me a peace of mind. I train and my brain goes silent. There are very little to no thoughts that go through my brain during training or fighting. Maybe I'm not being mindful enough but, I really enjoy that feeling of not having anything going on in my head. People ask me about my fights and a common reply for me is, "I honestly don't remember". I just get in the ring, silence my mind, and fight. This probably won't make me a champion. It does let me enjoy my life though.
What Will This Month Bring?
I wrote about it before, but I'm restating it for myself. I want to run, lift weights, and go to class consistently this month. If I can, I'd like to add variety to the classes that I take but I don't want to try and do too much.
There are some important tasks that I need to do this month:
Extend my visa
Book Travel Tickets
Decide on "Month 4" plans
Decide if I want to compete in Sanda
I'll explain these tasks in another post.
Reflecting on the Holidays
One thing that has been odd is, the holidays passing by with nothing. Lent, Passover, and eventually Easter will pass with nothing going on. Just me working and training. Making content, trying to make this life that I want possible. Again, the visit from my girlfriend made me realize all the other stuff that I'm missing.
I'll have to treat my fights like my own personal holidays.
Thank you as always for reading. If you're from my past jobs or family, thank you for the support!
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