"Cloudy Mind
A Room Reflects Thought
One's Danger"
As the sore on my arm heals, but the irritation expands, I realize that this weekend was a great weekend for myself. My heart rate was at it's lowest in a long time (49 bpm) while sleeping, my mood improved, I ate better, and I actually had fun. Taking photos and studying made me happy, which was really hard for me to do a couple days ago. It was difficult simply because I was tired. The tiredness I felt made doing anything that I normally would a chore. Even meditation, where you just sit there and breathe, was too much for my sluggish mind.
I need more weekends.
Luckily the holidays are here so I should get plenty of weekends. Along with study and photo taking I did plenty of video watching. Mostly for entertainment but some educational. The videos on the educational end were about Buddhism, Thai, travel, photography, and studying abroad. I really do want to travel and learn.
I want to be an adventurer again.
Part of me thought about how after leaving Maling behind, I've felt a bit "empty". As if the purpose and dedication that I had while training Kung Fu at that school left me. Since then, its just been me searching for what will fill that gap until I get back to that kind of life.
The life of a warrior monk, the life of a martial artist.
Progress towards saving money for travels is good, now I think I'll just work towards making my life similar to how it was then. Not the same schedule, just the same feeling. The feeling of having something to work on each and every day that you love. Where the work improves yourself. Where the work isn't work.
Study. Train. Save Money.
That's the phrase for my life right now.
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