What am I searching for?
During my many years of training Shaolin Kung Fu* I've learned different ways of meditation. Through my travels, I've been able to see how different cultures use/view meditation. The Forest Monks of Thailand have a wide variety of meditation methods. Walking, mindfulness exercises, as well as a variety of sitting postures. From Shaolin, our main way of developing mindfulness is through our training. The next most used method for Shaolin would be Standing Meditation (Zhan Zhuang) or Qi Gong exercises. Finally, there is the traditional sitting meditation.
This order is due to my focus on following the "Warrior Monk" path. Those following this path with spend the majority of their time drilling forms, power training, and trying to understand the various theories that go with the martial practice.
“For a tea master tea is everything, but for a Zen Buddhist priest, tea is simply one part of Zen”.
Kenin Magami
After a fun Mid Autumn Festival, I found myself sipping on some electrolytes. Staring out into the greenery that surrounded the hotel. Wet clothes hung behind me, bags full of plastic bottles piled in a corner, and the drip of AC gently touching the floor. For some reason, this was the environment that provoked me to question;
"What am I searching for?"
Eight months at this Kung Fu School. 10 months at Maling. Years of work, saving money, to keep my Kung Fu training going. Kung Fu has always scratched an itch that nothing else did. It brought joy and fulfillment. Yet, none of these really answer the question.
Gong An's, Mantras, Prayers
Perhaps this is my personal Gong An (or Koan, in Japanese). The most popular Gong An being, "Who is calling the Buddha" or simply, "Who am I?". Over the next few days I will keep repeating this phrase. In training. In eating. In sleeping. To try and get my mind one step closer towards understanding.
Perhaps through understanding, I'll finally answer this question.
*Now, 2 years in China and about 2-3 years of self study
📿Johnny
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